A Female Relative’s (And A Sailor’s) Guide to the Second Act

It Was The Cat!

Chorus: (all sailors, female relatives, Ralph, Josephine)
Carefully on tiptoe stealing, breathing gently as we may, every step with caution feeling, we will softly steal away.
Captain: (stamps) (chord)
Chorus: Goodness me — Why what was that?
Dick: Silent be, it was the cat.
Chorus: It was – it was the cat.
Captain: (whispered) They’re right, it was the cat!
Chorus:
Pull ashore in fashion steady, Hymen will defray the fare, for a clergyman is ready, to unite the happy pair!
Captain: (stamps) (chord)
Chorus: Goodness me, why, what was that?
Dick: Silent be, again the cat!
Chorus: It was again that cat!
Captain: (whispered) They’re right, it was the cat!
Chorus: Every step with caution feeling, we will softly steal away, every step with caution feeling, we will steal away!

He is an Englishman

Boatswain: He is an Englishman, for he himself hath said it, and it’s greatly to his credit, that he is an Englishman!
Chorus: That he is an Englishman!
Boatswain: For he might have been a Roosian, A French, or Turk, or Proosian, or perhaps I-ta-li-an!
Chorus: Or perhaps I-ta-li-an!
Boatswain: But in spite of all temptations, to belong to other nations, he remains an Englishman! He remains an Englishman.
Chorus: But in spite of all temptations, to belong to other nations, he remains an Englishman, he remains an Englishman.

Buttercup’s legend

Buttercup:
A many years ago, when I was young and charming, as some of you may know, I practiced baby-farming
Chorus:
Now this is most alarming! When she was young and charming, she practiced baby-farming, a many years ago.
Buttercup:
Two tender babes I nursed: one was of low condition, the other upper crust, a regular patrician.
Chorus: (explaining)
Now this is the position: one was of low condition, the other a patrician, a many years ago.
Buttercup:
Oh, bitter is my cup! However could I do it? I mixed those children up, and not a creature knew it.
Chorus: However could you do it? Some day, no doubt, you’ll rue it, although no creature knew it, so many years ago.
Buttercup:
In time each little waif forsook his foster-mother, the well born babe was Ralph – your captain was the other!
Chorus: They left their foster-mother, the one was Ralph, our brother, our captain was the other, a many years ago.

Finale

Captain: For he’s the Captain of the Pinafore
Chorus: (Ralph, Josephine, Female Relatives, Sailors, Sir Joseph, Buttercup) And a right good captain too!
Captain: And though before my fall I was captain of you all, now I’m a member of the crew.
Chorus: And though before his fall he was captain of us all, now he’s a member of the crew.
Chorus + Captain: Then give three cheers and one cheer more for the former Captain of the Pinafore, then give three cheers and one cheer more for the Captain of the Pinafore!
Buttercup: For I’m called Little Buttercup, dear Little Buttercup, though I could never tell why; but still I’m called Buttercup, poor Little Buttercup, Sweet Little Buttercup, aye!
Chorus: (Ralph, Josephine, Female Relatives, Sailors, Captain, Sir Joseph)
For she’s called Little Buttercup, dear Little Buttercup, though she could never tell why; but still she’s called Buttercup, poor Little Buttercup, Sweet Little Buttercup, aye!
Sir Joseph: I am the Monarch of the Sea, and when I’ve married thee, I’ll be true to the devotion that my love implants.
Hebe: Then good-bye to his sisters and his cousins and his aunts, especially his cousins whom he reckons up by dozens, and his aunts!
Chorus: (all characters)
For he is an Englishman, and he himself hath said it, and it’s greatly to his credit, that he is an Englishman, that he is an Englishman.

Betharoni

http://www.gourmetinthefield.com

View more posts from this author